I read Harry Windsor’s Book Spare
unlike the way I’ve read most
others: in a few days, cover to cover. I
bought the early 2023 chart-topping
non-fiction book, heavy, hardcover and all
against my better judgement. I don’t
like the idea of royalty in an era of equal
rights and opportunities. I’ve read
books on the sordid history of land ownership
and usage in England. I’ve worked
for the promise of human rights to include
refugees. But an old friend with
whom I’d talked about things said he’d read
it. I should read it and tell him
what I thought. We’ll be meeting in Spring –
soon. It was not what I expected. This is an
autobiography – a life story. In the
preface the reader is told of a meeting of
Harry, his father the then Prince Charles
and his brother William, the heir, to make a
case for his need to leave the
royal family in the UK and live elsewhere. His
father and brother don’t get it.
The preface says the book is an explanation
for why he had to make the choice that
he and his wife escape the royal life in
England and its associated constant
media scrutiny and harassment. Almost at the beginning readers learn
that as a child of 12 Harry hears
of the death of his mother, Princess Diana, in
Paris by car crash. His memory
of his mother – and difficulties remembering –
arise throughout. The book moves
to school days. He went first to Ludgrove,
then to Eton. He did not excel at scholarly
activities, but rather at sport – rugby. As a
result, unlike his father Prince Charles
and brother Prince William it was not
suggested that he attend a university.
But he did have some interest in the Military.
At this point the book turns to describe
his time in the military from army
boot camp on. He shifted to managing air
attacks. Then he moved to flying.
There are interesting details of his training
to pilot an Apache Helicopter. He
was active at first in Iraq, then in
Afghanistan directing aircraft. Finally, as
an Apache helicopter pilot, he was very active
in air attacks. He wanted to be
active in war and he was. Along the way there
are friendships, a deep love of
Africa and Lesotho in Africa. He also had a
long-time girlfriend from Africa. When
the military period of his life comes to an
end he turns to things of royalty –
supporting some of the organizations for
worthy causes that he has founded or
pegged his support to along the way. Finally, at this stage, he turns his
story to describe how he found and
fell in love with the woman who became his
wife. How he managed to date her and
go to Africa with her are interesting. The
details of reporting that he had a
girlfriend, then his desire to marry, within a
royal family are interesting. His
marriage is described, and the birth of their
children. Then there are those special
difficulties concerning UK media
treatment of royalty and of his wife. The
difficulties lead to his leaving the
royal life in England for a family life in
America. Only after reading this book and
begining reflecting did I realize the
special nature of the life that the
interesting read had obscured - I had read the
book without fully recognizing important
things. For example, from his birth until 2022
there were always bodyguards close to Harry –
wherever he was. As a child there
was a nanny plus there were friendly adults
who served as minders – for example
going to Lesotho with him in a school break
from Eton. One muses whether his
eagerness for military service was an early
attempt to break free from the
royal situation. Issues with an aggressive
press began early – with his mother’s
death for example. These media treatment
issues continue to arise again and again
before peaking around his wife Meagan –
harassing family and friends for photographs
and their alleged context. Things like his
easy access to huge castles and lands
like Balmoral or Sandringham just float past
and seem unpretentious and normal,
as they were to him. Shooting partridges with
your brother, or your first shooting
of a deer, equally manage to just slip by as
something that happens – although the
book smoothly adds the value of culling the
number of deer. The expected exposure of family dirty
laundry did not really happen in my
reading of the book. Yes, there were
criticisms but also good sides of his
family, even with respect to his father – now
King Charles III – and brother William
– now heir in waiting. The big divide – and
the one that led to the public split
– is presented as the view of his Pa and
brother that one just puts up with
media and it passes. Harry felt he had to
protect his wife from those vicious
attacks. And he hinted that the royal system
in which he was caught seemed to some
extent to play the media to the advantage of
the top royals. True there are reported criticisms of
Meagan by his brother that seem to be
deeper. A suggestion that he should drop her
as his wife at the time he was talking
of taking her away from the UK scene. But the
later report of dislike of Meagan
within the royal family was not developed and
is somewhat offset by the reports
of her generally positive reception by the
family at the beginning. There
are criticisms by Harry of palace public
relations staff around the time of his
discussions with his family about how the
royals should deal with his concerns for
Meagan, Meagan’s treatment by the media
and his idea to move away from the UK scene at
least part-time. The family
meeting to discuss options regarding what
Harry might do reminds me of what I
called a European meeting style. It was not a
meeting to develop a new
agreement, but a meeting for the majority to
ratify an agreement developed by
one or more for that purpose. Harry had
evidently not been part of the negotiating
of the agreement to be adopted. He was not a
party to it. The structure of the book is a little
unusual. There is no table of
contents and there are no chapters. But the
book contains three labelled sections:
part 1 out of the night that covers me;
part 2 bloody but unbowed;
and part 3 captain of my soul. Part 1
covers the death of his mother, childhood,
and schooldays in about 100 pages. Within
these three parts each of the texts
is divided into numbered sections. The first
part has 58 numbered sections. The numbered
sections form a kind of time sequence but also
tell particular life episodes.
Part 2 covers his time as an adult, his going
into the army, his army years and
the beginnings of socially useful charitable
initiatives normally associated
with “royals” - visiting injured soldiers,
establishing sports organizations for
injured soldiers and more. This is the biggest
of the three sections – about 140
pages – a little bigger that the third and
last section of about 125 pages that
covers finding Meagan, marrying her, moving to
America and having a family of two
children with her. There is a short 6-page
“Epilogue” that covers Harry’s
return to England on the death of his “granny”
Queen Elizabeth II, his
participation in her funeral, his and Meg’s
return to America. He notes the
special relationship he felt he had with his
granny. There is no conclusion – that is left
for readers and others. So perhaps
I should offer something. I think the Royal Family made the right
decision on the options it had in
response to Harry’s desire to move. He ought
to go. I say that for his sake as
well as for those concerns about Meagan and
his family that he raises. Maybe
the deal the royals cut was not generous
towards him, but consider what he got. Harry
comes across in his book as a
fellow human being to readers – despite the
big estates, houses, deer shoots
and partridge shoots, and his many paid trips
to spend time with his dear
friends in Lesotho, Africa. He ended up where
his mother wanted to be: free and
outside of the whole what might be called the
“royalty control system” with the
media and all. For humans and animals freedom matters.
Feeling a sense of freedom is
important. The book shows Harry revelled in
freedom when he had moments close
to it – for example with his friends in
Lesotho. And by the end of the book Harry
is no longer “spare”. That is the role now
cast for his brother William’s
children – poor things. But better for him, he
is now “free”. He is building a
life for his family with Meagan. The new freedom is no doubt scary for
Harry and he is rightly fearful of
his new life free from the royalty provision
of his bodyguards. And he will
miss the platform he appreciated and that he
enjoyed for his charitable work. Harry
notes proudly that Meagan seems to share the
gift of charisma that his mother possessed
with crowds during a tour and with her
charities. If so, and if he and Meagan remain
a mutually respectful team, they may become a
power couple with helpful lives. They
have already changed UK royalty. Hopefully
they are changing what royalty
means. Personally, I would like to believe
there is a way to get rid of the whole
royalty thing. But I can only think of the
French way to do that. Their way did
not bring a good transition in France, leaving
a legacy of guillotines then
Napoleon and war all over Europe. But Harry’s
book clearly shows that “royalty”
is not always a good thing for all the royals
caught up in it. Maybe a structured
way of letting them go free would be a useful
reform. There is life after
Spare.